Monday, September 26, 2011

Selfishness and love life

Any human relationship in which we are committed necessarily imply a waiver. I mean, yes I accept the commitment to live with a partner, agree to be in a relationship with that person I chose as my partner. However, to give me another, I need a good dose of self love and myself. But "given to others" has been misrepresented in our society, first we give others, especially the couple, and finally we come in last.

We believe that if we make our partners happy, then they will or they will respond with the same degree of love, gratitude or love. But nothing further from the truth, especially when your links are making with people with strong narcissistic traits. The need, demand, selfishness dominate life partner. There is only room for a need for an interest, for a person to an ego, and narcissists never rest so that this assumption is fulfilled in all their relationships, and the couple even more so. That kind of selfishness is full of coldness, callousness and contempt meet the needs of the couple.

The only thing acceptable is the accuracy narcissistic, all admiration and urgent is the only thing possible in this world of two is worship. The relationships full of selfishness lurks the fear, the terror of abandonment, heartbreak and panic of not living up to that wonderful love. The uncertainties arise from the depths of the soul, from childhood wounds we are trying to silence through links destructive and hateful.

Egoism can be understood in two ways: The first of them is in direct relation to defend what is mine, what belongs to me and I'm not willing to compromise in this category are the dignity, self esteem, the treatment acceptable and non-violent and respect. In the second category is the narcissistic self that can only receive but can not be delivered to a life partner without conditions.

This selfishness is at the very heart of what makes some couples as dysfunctional. People with self-interest of this nature, there is no love, only love themselves. The couple is a magnified reflection of his ego, his lack of personal identity and the need to have another one that will confirm his greatness. The narcissistic self is subtle. Comes slowly. I do not perceive.

We did not realize that from time to time we will invalidate, discounting to finish without a personal reference. Those aspects that support a couple are out of balance. The attention and importance are only for the selfish, otherwise no specific value. Solidarity slips between the sheets and does not appear anywhere, and much less privacy.

The generosity only when the daffodils denotes estimate that may receive some or a lot in return, otherwise, never be able to understand what your partner live, suffer or want. There is only one space and this has to cover the narcissist, and that is where their selfishness comes with a great gala and takes over the entire space of the relationship, therefore, these links are live so deeply selfish destructive and painful.